I have always been an introvert and I am pretty sure I always will be. I covered the topic lightly before in my 20 myths about introverts that aren't true post which you can read HERE. Today, however, I wanted to go more in-depth. I wanted to talk about what being an introvert means to me as an individual and why I am proud to describe myself as an introvert.
Whether you are a fellow introvert, extrovert or even an ambivert, I hope you find this post insightful or at least semi-interesting, I try my hardest.
First of all, I would like to clear up that introversion and extroversion are personality traits, not mental illnesses. Just because you are more of an introvert it doesn't mean you have social anxiety. Although saying that, being an introvert can predispose you to social anxiety. But I wouldn't say introversion alone would cause you to have social anxiety- if that makes sense?
For as long as I can remember, I have always been shy and quiet. On every school report growing up, they told me to put my hand up more in class to help boost my confidence. I am not going to dismiss the fact for some children this may help them out, for me, it just wasn't going to be the case. I was always going to be the shy one, the listener and not the talker. Although I did try and put my hand up more, it just wasn't for me and didn't help at all- it just made me more anxious.
For as long as I can remember, I have always been shy and quiet. On every school report growing up, they told me to put my hand up more in class to help boost my confidence. I am not going to dismiss the fact for some children this may help them out, for me, it just wasn't going to be the case. I was always going to be the shy one, the listener and not the talker. Although I did try and put my hand up more, it just wasn't for me and didn't help at all- it just made me more anxious.
However, this is actually one of the biggest reasons why I am proud to be an introvert. I am a fantastic listener. I hate talking about my worries and troubles with others ( ironic I know as I write a blog) but I would much rather listen to other people's. I have ears like a bat, no, not aesthetically (although that would be quite funny) but is in their ability to function.
This leads me on nicely, to my second point about why I am proud to be an introvert: my ability to have deep and meaningful discussions with other fellow introverts. I can't bear talking about the weather, summer holiday plans or the latest shades of lipstick in Macs new collection but get me talking about ethics, morals, society or feminism and I could go for hours. I know this can be pretty intimidating or bizarre for some people but it's just the way myself and so many other introverts are. My mind is constantly going, whizzing around like a washing machine with ideas and thoughts- sometimes I just need to share these with others!
However, please bear in mind that when talking about introversion, there is no blanket answer that is the same for everyone out there. Some introverts are happy to talk to thousands of people on stage but talking to those individuals alone, is extremely challenging and almost impossible. For me, I struggle to talk to large groups of people and much prefer one to one conversations.
You see talking to others really wears me out. It exhausts me, even just the thought of it tires me out. This is why I have never had a friendship group bigger than four people. I just can't get my voice and opinions across, I hate it! I love one to one conversations with people (bearing in mind I am comfortable with them and we are talking about something that is generally interesting.) This is another reason why I am proud to be an introvert. When given the chance I can develop one to one meaningful relationships with people that are really worth while.
Of course being an introvert isn't all plain sailing. Sometimes I wish I could be more involved in social gatherings, hold better conversations with people or just get involved with life more. However, taking into consideration my mental health issues and my past, I am happy to be an introvert. I will always get lost in my overactive brain and the inter-wiring of over analysing everything, forgetting that I actually need to talk to the person I am sat with.I will always pick a movie night in over a mad night out...
The real question is... Who's going to join me?!
Let me know if you are an introvert or extrovert in the comments below and if you are proud to be so?
I am an introvert and I love it! I like having small friendship groups because then I get to know everyone well x
ReplyDeletewww.blossomofhope.blogspot.com
I totally agree with you! I hate large friendship groups when only the loud ones get heard x
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Thank you for writing this, I'm also a proud introvert. I've always had a small friendship group and struggle speaking in meetings and large groups. Yet in my job role I also train (stand up in front of) 20/30 staff. Strange ey?! Great post, Hannah x
ReplyDeletethecharitypanda.blogspot.co.uk
aw! Yes, it's weird how being an introvert affects people in different ways x
DeleteI used to be a very big introvert but now I'm unsure where I am, or where I'd place myself inbetween being an introvert and an extrovert. That's because the majority of the time I like spending time with my own company, or just one other person, four at most. But at the same time I have a big friendship group, and there are times when I want to go to parties and be crazy!! But to every party I've been to for the past few years I've been hit by a wave of not wanting to be there and feeling lonely. I don't know where I stand to be honest. But I'm glad you know who you are and are proud of it!
ReplyDeleteLauren xx
www.teastainedlauren.blogspot.co.uk
aww, your probably an ambivert then- a bit of both! xx
DeleteVery proud to be a fellow introvert! It wasn't until last year that I really discovered what that meant, but it explains why I've always been a listener and never felt the need to talk. I can definitely relate to not enjoying small talk, it's so tedious! Get me onto a subject that I love and I won't be able to stop talking. I have to have a lot of me-time to recharge my social capabilities too.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! : )
Steph x.
marvelsteph.blogspot.co.nz
yay! Yes, I need time every day to recharge in order to be able to social interact with people, I find it so hard especially when people think I am rude x
DeleteI'm an introverted extrovert so I literally have the best and worst parts of both traits. I'm a definite people person but I have terrible social anxiety and I don't like answering my phone, that sort of thing.
ReplyDeleteVickie | http://dearvictoria.co.uk
aw bless you! I know how you feel- I really struggle with the phone! One of my biggest fears x
DeleteI am most definitely an introvert although since spending a year travelling I find it much easier to talk to people. I'd still rather lick a nettle than talk in front of a crowd though!
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alrightblondie.com
haha! That made me laugh! To be honest, so would I! XX
DeleteReally glad you made the distinction between mental health and personality traits, as i am more of an extrovert but also have social anxiety - it is possible! I will chat away and never shut up, but inside i feel so uncomfortable and paranoid. I think it's a contrast between external and internal presentation, if that makes sense? Thank-you for this x
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aw that's okay! I am sorry to hear that you have social anxiety. I feel like it's a very complex area to get your head around but I think raising awareness of it, is so important so people start to understand better what the terms mean x
DeleteI used to be super introverted, now I'm more ambivalent. I still have my introverted days where I have to recharge after being with a lot of people. Lissanne x
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aw yeah, I feel like we all need those days sometimes x
DeleteI can completely relate to this! I can't do small talk, at all! I sometimes really try but I just feel awkward and the conversation doesn't flow! I'm totally proud to be Introvert too :)
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small talk is the worst thing! I get lost in my own thoughts and really get no joy from talking to others in meaningless conversation
DeleteI LOVE THIS SO MUCH. Reading about other peoples experiences with being an introvert is like my favourite thing so thank you so much for sharing :) Introversion is a topic I'm actually quite passionate about cause I feel like a lot of people just don't really get what it actually means. People from my class even call me proud introvert sometimes haha. My best friend is an introvert too & we always have the best conversations - about things I actually care about instead of small talk x
ReplyDeleteSara / AboutLittleThiings
aw that's okay lovely! Yes, I agree not a lot of people understand what it means! aw that's lovely you and your best friend have such great conversations. I bet if we ever got the chance to meet I bet we would be the same x
DeleteI love this! I can completely relate to this post, I am definitely an introvert! x
ReplyDeletehttp://yasbethx.blogspot.co.uk/
aw thank you x
DeleteMy sister is an introvert and I sent this post to her! She said she liked reading it!
ReplyDeleteaw thank you for sharing x
DeleteI think I'm definitely an introvert and you're right that one big positive is that we're usually great listeners. I much prefer one on one conversations as well but I think a lot of that has to do with the social anxiety I get when I'm in a large group.
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Yes, I agree! I really enjoy listening to others and one to one conversations x
DeleteI think I'm definitely an extrovert but with a bit of social anxiety which Ive found can be a really difficult combination to deal with. I need to be around people quite frequently and I feel my absolute best when I'm being social but until I get to know someone I really struggle with anxiousness so balancing that need for social connection with a want to not put my self in positions that are uncomfortable is hard! When I first started university I struggled to make friends and that lack of interaction really really effected my mental health! xx
ReplyDeletekate | katedruryy.co.uk
aw no I am really sorry to hear that! I find it hard to understand extroversion because I have never been one myself but I fully understand that dealing with social anxiety and being an extrovert must be pretty though x
DeleteI love this post! :) I live with my best friend and we are polar opposites when it comes to this. She is an extrovert and I'm a big-time introvert. I have learnt recently though that it doesn't mean I don't ENJOY spending time with people - it just means that I find it exhausting and my energy comes from spending time with myself :) I'd say I'm proud to be an introvert, too!
ReplyDeleteAlice | Whiskey Jars Blog
aw yes! You hit the nail on the head! I enjoy spending time with people, I just know that I need to do it in small chunks not all in one go x
DeleteYou've just helped me learn something new today. I've never even heard of the word introvert let alone know what it means, turns out I'm one too. Used to bug me when my teachers told me to get more involved in large class discussions and put my hand up more, if I didn't they knocked my grade down which is a bit unfair. I CANNOT stand public speaking or being in large groups etc it just breaks me, my largest friendship group was 5 people and that was pushing it x
ReplyDeleteClaire ❤ | My Little Memoir
aw I am so glad you learnt something from reading my blog- that really means a lot to me x
DeleteI am a fellow introvert & I really enjoyed reading this post :) It's nice to read about how other introverts feel about certain things as it's so relatable. I HATE small talk! It still terrifies me. The idea of a stranger walking up to me and trying to start a conversation with me. Outside of the online world, I really struggle to talk to new people. Like you, I love more meaningful conversation and will often ask my friends some really deep questions :D I know that I come across as strange to some people when I do this,; I'm just so curious! Now that I'm older, I really appreciate being an introvert but when I was younger, it made me feel like I was inadequate and I wished to be more confident. I am proud of being an introvert now though :)
ReplyDeleteaw thank you for your lovely comment. Sometimes I feel inadequate but I have come to terms with that's just who I am. I am glad to hear that you also hate small talk! I hate talking to strangers, even the thought of it scares me! :) xx
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